A Day In The Life

6:45am – Alarm goes off, it’s another morning brought in my Deer Tick’s “Not So Dense”. The heavy guitar strums awake me in an annoyed frenzy to shut it off. I lay there contemplating moving or getting up at all. I remember I have an 8 0’clock Kinesiology class followed by lab, which I contemplate skipping for the first time this year just for a few more hours of shut eye. After weighing the pros and cons, half asleep, terrified I may not be able to choose any longer if I do fall back asleep, I pull myself out of the high bed and drag myself into the bathroom.

Routines. My morning is filled with them. Go to the bathroom, wash face, make coffee, toast bagels, bowl of cereal (this morning’s choice is a healthy bowl of Kellogg’s pops). As I leave the bathroom, I remembered last night I let pup and rock-o inside due to the dense cold. They great me at the bathroom door with some licks and wagging tails. As I make my way across the chilly hardwood floor, I open the door and say my goodbyes to the dogs. I throw on some heavy layers of clothes, its roughly twenty degrees out this morning. I barley have enough time to sit at the breakfast bar, and eat my cereal, apply peanut butter and honey to my bagel and take a couple sips of coffee, until I notice the clock says 7:25. I scarf down all the food I can, and fill up my tumbler of coffee, grab my bags and head out.

The thirty minute drive into town is spent catching up on National Public Radio’s (NPR) news of the day. I try to make sense of today’s political jabber, but remembered I had my ipod with me, and get annoyed very easy with the arguing. I put it on shuffle, sip coffee and bring in Scioto County’s sunrise.

7:57am – I arrive three minutes before eight. After giving up trying to find any decent parking space, in an already crowded lot, I park by the police station and proceed on a steady powerful walk to Massie Hall. I climb up to the second floor, with a good high knee bounce in my stride, make my way to room 206, and walk into the class, and retrieve today's lecture power points with a minute to spare. I sit down and get comfortable. Today’s lecture will be about biomechanics, and the next hour and five minutes are spent getting hit with a hundred different terms, differential human movements, and everything in-between. I’m on a good 3-4 cups of coffee by now, but my morning buzz is starting to wear off. Luckily, biomechanics is something that really grabs my interest, so it doesn’t give much to keep a watchful eye and listening ear.

9:15am – We head to the third floor for the second part of class, which today will consist of a bone and joint identification lab. While many students work in groups, looking at different bones, taking there time in-between to talk about jersey shore, and asking stupid questions, I am making check marks and highlighting words my lab packet in a quick and efficient pace. We are given about fifty body parts including, femur, hand, wrist, fibula, tibia, etc… After forty five minutes, I remembered last night contemplating waking up at 6am, and running a very dark and cold five miler before I head into town, or opting to get some sleep and running after lab. I opted on number two, yesterday’s workout, though fairly short but fast on the track, left my right soleus muscle (shin-splints) a bit tight and painful.


10:00am – After finishing up marking and identifying every bone in our lab, I make my way to the gym. Only a couple of people are there shooting around, and doing some sprints. I quickly change into half tights, a light half-zip, and gloves. As I walk outside to start, there is still a fright chill in the air, making me wish I would of packed full-tights and a hat. I save the previous time on my chronograph (25:36 – 3.5 mile cool down from yesterday’s run), start my watch from zero, and head out on the morning route which many bears before me know quite well. As I notice an annoying small pain in my shin, I think about jumping on the grassy floodwall for an out and back, but decide against it because it would be easier to break up the morning run and get some splits.

The usual things run through my head… “what homework or tests do I have coming up?”, “I’m very hungry”, “I wish it was spring”… and this weekend’s race usually slips in there, probably me going into the last lap making a move right before the last turn and holding a good lead through the line… I reach the turnaround in 7:07 pace, and calculate I’ll probably average right under 7:05 due to the downhill, and warming up on the way back to campus. At 2.8 miles, an elderly lady had her dog run off the porch, and starting yipping at me. I look back and notice she is yelling for her dog to come back to her. I felt bad, so I tried reaching for the little thing to come to me so I could grab it and give it back to her, but after a good five minutes and playing chase and attack, I gave up. I started to get chilled, and needed to get back on the road, so I took off. I heard the women yelling at her dog more, but I thought after a couple hundred yards under seven minute pace the dog would give up. I looked back, after hearing the lady calling still, but he was in no sight, so once again I let my mind slip into a haze.

I get back to the gym in 35:17. (7:03 pace) I decided a good stretch is in order, I was pretty tight the entire morning, and after warming up the muscles it was a great time to get the rust of the of legs. I flip over one of the golfing mats on the stage and spend fifteen minutes holding stretches 25-30 seconds. After going about my routine, I stand up and do a quick hurdle routine I’ve come to love, learning it through a Jay Johnson video over winter break. After, I set up my phone to Pandora’s Cold War Kids station, and as I start doing the Team Indiana Elite core workout (minus the strides). A good hour has went by after starting the run, and after the workout is complete, I change, splash water on my face trying to clean up as much as possible, and head to Shawnees local café, called the Bears Den for some lunch.

11:30am – I notice Eric Putnam was with a younger kid and an older lady. A recruit! Awesome, I thought. I make my way over there and I’m greeted by Eric who introduces me to Donaven, a senior out of Grove city, and respectable runner. After a quick handshake and some words, I make my way see what the den has to offer today. In the grill station, a Sedexo lady is cooking up fresh peppers, and shrimp. I decide to get a bowl, and a big plate of spaghetti and meatballs, salad, and two glasses of chocolate milk and make my way to the big round table.

I take my time and conversating with everyone, as more runners pile into the café for lunch. Done with classes for today, I sit back, enjoy and take part in the different topics.

12:30pm -The decide to try and take a nap at my girlfriend Jamie’s dorm. We watch some sort of western documentary on the History Channel and drift in and out of sleep. The small twin bed can be a bit of a challenge to get comfortable, but this morning’s routine left me sleepy.

2:00pm – Jamie has practice, so I head to the library and spend a good bit of time watching flotrack videos, lurking on Letsrun threads, and doing what every collegiate runner does when given free time and a computer.

2:45pm – I notice I’m starting to get the afternoon heaviness, and decide to make a trip to Starbucks. I am greeted by my old manager, a fake cheesy smile, and a couple of “how do ya does”, and I order a double shot of espresso, and a cinnamon scone. I notice an older customer sitting at the table that I’ve come to talk to over the years. I greeted him and spent forty five minutes drinking coffee and talking about nutrition… “That’s what wrong with America. Portion sizes, High-Fructose corn syrup, and welfare”… I notice it’s almost 3:30pm, and planned on heating my shin before practice, so I said my goodbyes and headed back to the trainers.

3:30pm – I walk into the trainers, noticing the head trainer, doing some sort of ab-workout, sweating profusely; I grabbed a towel, heating pad, and strap for myself. I click on some tunes with my ipod and relax, letting the heat seep deep into my muscles in my lower right leg. I am very specific that I heat for exactly ten minutes, I keep a watchful eye on the time, and after that ten minutes passed I head back down stairs to be greeted by some of the guys on the team who are getting ready for practice. We quickly are drawn to the gym floor, and basketballs are swirling through the air, usually hitting the rims and bouncing off, or missing the hoop completely. Are lack of athletic talent is shown, as basketballs quickly become hazardous missiles thrown about in the air.

4:05pm – The team heads out for yet another two mile warm up, this time Galen Dills and I lead the team and decide to run the loop that has come to be known as, “Michael Owen two-mile loop”. We swing around the biker club, and after two hundred yards or so, we turn around at an old road and I check the first mile, 7:07. Not too fast, I thought. As we retrace our steps back to the gym, Breydon, Galen, and I are up front talking about tattoos and girls usually. Typical conversing. We stop just short of the gym entrance and I check my watch. 13:41. Whoops. That last mile of the “warm-up” was 6:34. Shin was feeling pretty good tough so I wasn’t worried. As we stretch and go about our small routines, I pay close attention to my lower legs and make sure they are warmed up and fully stretched out.

We planned earlier in the week, about running out at the forest for some trail action today, but after having a recruit here and running with us, I opted to cancel today's trip to make sure we are here as a team for the senior. “Sprint Drillizs, COMON’!!!” Eric Putnam’s voice echoes over the gym, as we make our way to the alumni-green for some typical high knees, butt kicks, etc... After our last stride, I yelled, “Huddle!” The team, hands on each others shoulders, come together, and we decided the route for today. Some want Kentucky, Some want Zig-Zag, but a lot of runners are only going 45 minutes, so we agree for an out and back on the floodwall would be nice.

We set out, and once up on the grassy hill, I loosen up nicely, and we carry an easy 7:10 pace, talking about the usual stuff. Behind the floodwall, after two miles, it becomes very muddy, as we jump and hurdle large mud pit’s, and try to keep our feet dry as long as possible. Twenty two minutes and thirty seconds we turn back, and head west back to campus. Eric Putnam and I are, once again, in a pretty heavy musical discussion. He herd Bruce Springsteen’s new single today off his upcoming album, and had to explain how good it was.

Once back on the floodwall, two miles from campus, I was thankful I had a high collar half –zip. I quickly push the zipper all the way up, so my neck is saved from the typical eastern chilly winds. Once back on campus, the forty five minute guys drop off, Joe Stewart, Derek Ryan, Chuck Wentz and myself head out along the murals. We go out about five minutes, and head back. Chuck’s Garmin had 7.45, living by the clock, we add on, running laps around the alumni green until that little beep on his watch goes off.

5:30pm – We are going about our post-run stretches to some new age rap music being played over the loud speakers. The Shawnee State’s women’s basketball team has a game at 6pm, and there are shooting around going about their own rituals. I convince Breydon to come to the gym and lift with me. As we head to the weight room, today's focus is biceps, triceps, and forearms. After a good fifty minutes of curls, triceps kick-backs, wrist curls, etc… We decided to do the second part of the workout which is a core circuit of back extensions, abductor machine, sit-ups, med ball side-to-sides, etc…

6:45pm – After a long hour and fifteen in the gym, both of us are spent. Some of the guys are heading to b-dubs for boneless wing night, but I had previous plans. I was on the verge of death, starving so bad I decided to swing through Arby’s drive through for a couple of chicken sandwiches off their dollar menu. First time I had fast food in months, I try to be positive about it, and as I scarf down the delicious but tiny sandwiches. I parked my car outside the campus view dorms, and make my way to Jamie’s. I am greeted and let inside, where I become very very thirsty. I quickly take down a good thirty ounces of cool-aid I find in the fridge.

7:30pm - We head back out to my car, and drive the half mile to Holiday Inn. We act as casual as we can, as we walk by the front desk into the pool room, making no eye contact and making sure no questions are asked. I change into my running shorts and crawl into the hot tub. The daily tolls of a fifteen mile day, two core workouts and upper body routine are weighing down on me, as I find it very easy relax and let the small jets push against my back.

8:00pm – I drop Jamie off back at her dorm, she had previous plans with her friends to attend to men’s basketball game tonight, and I head back out on the road and make the long trip back North West to the cabin.

8:30pm – After I arrive back home, I turn on Serious-XM’s university station, and spend an hour cleaning up my vics, and packing. There is still a good bit of dirt from last time these multi-colored victory spikes have seen the ground. November 19th, 2011 Vancouver, Washington. That’s a story by itself, and one I rarely want to talk about. I grabbed my collection of spikes, and remembered when I was out west for Nationals I got twelve blue needle spikes from the Nike Store in Eugene, Oregon. I decided to wrench them in, and spent a couple minutes lurking at the beauty. My heart starts to thump and a quick shot of adrenaline shoot up my neck, but I quickly shut it down. "Not yet", I remind myself.

9:30pm – After packing my bag for the weekend, and getting stuff situated for school for the upcoming day, I go outside to use the bathroom and to bring in the starry cold night. Pup and Rock-o quickly notice the open opportunity and run inside the cabin. Yet again it’s a very chilly night, so I accept another night with the pups and agree to let them crash on the couch together.

Back in the warmth of my bed, I spend about thirty minutes screaming through four chapters in “Again to Carthage”, and have to force myself to put it down.

10:00pm – I notice the clock, and with a 7:45am wake up call the next morning I decided to turn the Lights out. I’ve brushed my teeth, face is washed, iron, multi-vitamin, and fish oil are taken, and I’m left with the days and the future thoughts to float around in my head. I begin to think about this season opener Saturday at Marietta. Once again I get myself quickly worked up, so I change up my thoughts, and only after a couple minutes I drift into a very deep deep slumber.

Building The Orb



These past couple years I've made myself in-prisoned in this image. Forcing to accept what I think is going to build me up when such things can cause me to fall apart. It takes sacrifices to get to your dreams. which I think I understood at a young age, but the temptations throughout the year, and the weight on my shoulders cause me to be soft often. I need to learn what is important, and carve myself into stone.

Knowing the task you set yourself up for, and understanding the commitment of this task can be two completely different windows to most people. Hell, even I sometimes take door number two -But, for once in my life I am truly ready give up any personal ambitions outside of the task in order to achieve greatness.

It's taken a lot of harsh terms for me to try to find meaning and balance in the type of life I live. Really, I wish this kind of youth on no one. The balance between complete sanity and living on the edge can be very thin.

Everyone always wants the trophy, championship ring, or self satisfaction but few of them really understand what those select few have to go through in order to be at the top. I've gone through a tremendous amount of up and downs in my life, only to come out on the other side, repeating the process over and over again. There is always going to be the summer of the mileage, the winter of strength, but never again will I be able to re-live my youth. But; after everything is all said and done I hope to be able to look back and say it was worth it all.

You might be wondering what I am trying to get at.  I really don't know myself. I guess what I am hooping if I write out what's in my head something will appear, and life will make sense. You live and learn, fall and try to get back up. Don't sweat the little things they say, but sometimes its like little things that define you.

I think that is why I am so obsessed with music. I try to find meaning in the lyrics and rhythm, and its never really let me down unlike most of things in my life. the simplicity and realistic tones of music create a vision in which I know there are bigger and better things out there. I try to find these things by attaching myself onto people or objects that make me feel happy or loved, but often these feelings never last. I've found relationships very hard to deal with. Often, I'm usually the one who is all over the place. Never settled with what I have, and always out to try to find bigger and better things. I hate the fact that I feel like I will never truly be happy until I'm out west someplace in a nice home, with a beautiful wife, children and a stable job. Though, this might never happen in my lift, its nice to think about and it helps pass the time. These thoughts I create inside myself help keep me going, hooping something productive will come out of them - But, after its all said and done I've always came to the conclusion there is nothing as concrete and real to me as my running.

"My only real secret was, commitment to the task. A promise so simple, but so impossibly hard to honor. How they could be expected to understand that"?...

I must put everything on hold, build up the orb so nothing can touch it, and commit myself completely and 100%.

Normality

I’ve decided it would be best to scratch Kent State December 9^th, and take my time off. I had a lot of time (more then I’d like to admit) making decisions on this upcoming spring battle on that silly oval, and could go into great detail, but I’m afraid that we would be here all night. As of now, I have a couple races in February that I’d like to do well in, and not running at Kent will allow sufficient time to do so.

I’ve put together a particularly detailed plan on mileage, workouts, strength routines and what not, which will take over my life once again, for roughly twenty-four weeks until the 2012 NAIA outdoor T & F national championships.

I am certainly enjoying my time off from aerobic work, but that feeling is starting to re-build itself once again. It’s been only five days into my break, and the sensation of dropping everything and letting loose on the roads is tingling in my legs. In this short thirteen day break, I will spend living one might call, the average college quest. Staying out late, getting rowdy at the bars, and trying to put together a some what respectable academic semester. As December 12^th gets here I will once again live the life of one who balances on the edge of mental breakdown, and absolute clarity.

But, for now I must use my brain in other means, which involves paper and writing utensils. As for my goals and ambitions for this upcoming season, perhaps with the loneliness of a winter spent alone in Toledo will give me some time to type up what is in my head.

(Re-reading my favorite novel for the fifth time, I’ve come across one of the most well written literature that I truly love. Hope you enjoy it as much as I do)

“We can all be good boys and wear our letter sweaters around and get our little degrees and find some nice girl to settle, you know down, with… take up what a friend of ours calls the hearty challenges of lawn care… Or we can blaze! Become legends in our own time, strike fear in the heart of mediocre talent everywhere! We can scald dogs, put records out of reach! Make the stands gasp as we blow into an unearthly kick from the hundred yards out! We can become God’s own messengers delivering the dreaded scrolls! We can race dark Satan himself till he wheezes fiery cinders down the back straightaway! They’ll speak our names in hushed tones, ‘those guys are animals’ they’ll say! We can lay it on the line, bust a gut, show them a clean pair of heels. We can sprint the turn on a spring breeze and feel the winter leave our feet. We can, by God, let our demons loose and just wail on!”

Never Gonna Give You Up

As I was walking around on campus today it began raining steadily as it does often in Portsmouth, and I got hit with that cool leafy smell of fall. The small that triggers one thing Cross Country, and I felt as if I have to give up the sport for another six months. Like we broke up or something. The sport that has been the most pleasurably and the most hateful thing that consumed my every thought since June. I have to say goodbye to.

Well, I thought to myself, I don't wanna give up just yet. I am in the best shape of my career, and with a good bit left in the tank I've planed a couple of races in the upcoming weeks.

Before I sit and reflect on the season and Nationals I will give you a glimpse ahead of the upcoming weeks.

This Thanksgiving I will be running the East Side Turkey Trot in Oregon, Ohio along side my older brother Jeremy and Sister in-law Kara. I am the returning champ, and plan to bring home the stunning $100 gift card to Second Sole and frozen turkey.

Also, In exactly two weeks and five days from today I will be giving my best efforts in breaking the fifteen minute barrier in a five thousand meters indoor track race at Kent State University on December 9th. This is something I've wanted for many of years, and I feel with a couple weeks worth of hard fast interval sessions on the track I will be able to break it.

So, I guess this is the time I talk about that silly five mile race in Washington. Going into the race I had a great deal of pressure on myself to help lead the pack through two miles. This was the plan for Mid-South, and since it worked out well then and with the possibility of a national title in grasp we all thought this would be the right thing to do.

Race day comes, mid forty's little wind no rain. Gun goes, relax relax relax. Patience. We get in-golfed by two hundred runners. it's an extremely aggressive battle to move up. Pushed my way through people making sure I loose no one on my team. We have a pack of five. 1200 meters in I get pushed hard from behind and fell. Quickly, I got up as things still seem very very crowded. Came through the first mile in 5:09. Slow, yes but patience. Mid 130's going through 2k. The pushing around every turn has seem to settle down, but not by much.

Focused on keeping everyone together, I find myself looking back every twenty seconds. Going through two miles I looked at the clock as it read 10:24 and as I made my last quick glance back to see what was left of the pack I took off. The next three miles all I could think about is how much my team needs me, the last three miles all I did was pass people. Went from being 130th place to finishing in 77th. I crossed the line in 25:33 making it a "Seasons" best by 18 seconds. My last three miles were 15:09 which is 5:03 pace, six seconds faster then what my first mile was.

What if? That's the question every runner asks themselves after they finish a race. What if I would've known the race would've been so fast? What if I went out in a 10 flat? How many more people could I of passed? What more could I of done?

I feel like in the situation I was in by two miles I did absolutely the best I could have done. I passed 53 people in the last 6k. Last year I would of been 20th place with the time I ran.

I know I'm better then 77th in the NAIA. I ran for my team, I ran as a pack, I didn't run for myself. Could I of been All-American? Top 40? Possibly, but I can't sit and dwell on this. All I can do is learn from this race, keep positive and move on.

As The World Turns

"That is the sort of race which one really enjoys – to feel at one’s peak on the day when it is necessary, and to be able to produce the pace at the very finish. It gives a thrill which compensates for months of training and toiling. But it is the sort of race that one wants only about once a season."

- John Lovelock

Twelve days, three hours, and thirty one minutes from now I will be in Vancouver, Washington toeing the chalky white line with six of the most hard working, determined runners I know and love. Going after a National Championship title is something people dream about, and to be able to chase that dream with my team bleeds through my mind every minute of the day.

As Lovelock said above, "...to be able to produce the pace at the very finish. It gives a thrill which compensates for months of training and toiling..." I wrote this quote sometime in early June on my Cross Country schedule that stood right by my alarm clock. Every morning and night I glanced over and spent seconds or hours thinking about the time and place where this would come true. The time is closing upon us.  I sit here and think about the countless miles, interval sessions, and hard work I put myself through and I'm ready to be able to put those words into action on November 19th.

This past Saturday was the 2011 Mid-South Conference championships. It was an experience I will never forget. Knowing that this season has been up and down for me, I came into the race with a plan. First loop of the course (around 3600m), I went out very conservative helping my teammates pack it up. I couldn't help but smile as I looked back, probably every four hundred yards, and was greeted with six or more Shawnee runners following my every stride.

As I made my move going into the woods I started picking off some of the dead weight (people who went out too fast), and I found myself in fifth place going into mile three. I was very aggressive the third mile, leaving my teammates to battle each other and other runners who would drop back. Perhaps it was the length of the two miles ahead or the quickly approaching fatigue that would yet set in, but I ran complacent in fifth and lost much of that initial drive the last 3200. I held pace, but as the last kilometer approached, and a pain in the ass side stitch grew, teammate Adam Schroeder ran up and after a few words of encouragement passed me to finish fifth place, around five seconds ahead.

I ran a 26:21 for a sixth place finish, making that a second faster then 2010 Conference, a personal best for the new course, and two spots ahead of last year. Afterward I felt a feeling of pure happiness. Not only did my team score a very low 18 points beating Cumberlands College by 34 points, but I was able to help lead most of the team to low placing spots and low times. That feeling surpassed any personal ambitions I had, and for the first time of the season I am relieved that I have seemed to of found my daemons.

Once again, I find myself counting down the hours till the big dance. Every action, every nutrient that enters my body, and every mile has a deep purpose. The hay might indeed be in the barn, and the fire inside of me is ready to burn that shit up.

2011 Mid-South Conference Team Champions

Blowin' In The Wind

It's been a while... Nine months to be exact. A lot has happened in those nine months which I may or may not want to talk about. I figured I'd come back here and write some jumble down to help cope with some stressful times. Probably going to end up talking about my running, and try to compare it to life. I always end up doing such things on here, but it's nice to create something that you can look back on and try to understand what you went through.

Recently, I've came back to Blogger to re-read some of my older posts to help me get through these next seventeen days. This season has been anything but rewarding to me. Coming into camp, I feel I had the summer of my life. I felt that I took my base training to the next level, incorporated some dynamic drills, and increased my mileage greatly. Living in Miamisburg with my older brother Jeremy and sister in-law Kara made for a very comfortable environment to live and train for three months. Looking back now there would be a number of things I would of changed/added to my lifestyle, but I can't do anything about it now.

The season Has been up and down. Dayton Flyer 5k, had a bad illness which with the addition of an awful heat index made for a miserable race. Ran, I believe, ~45 seconds slower then 2010. Shook that off, ran solid at Iona running ten seconds faster and some twenty sports better then 2010. I thought, "Ok, with a couple workouts i'll be up there". Then, something changed. The drive I used to have last year seemed to have faded out. During the next month or so I seemed always on edge, ready to be negative about any un-healthy situation I was in. My training went downhill, and with that everything else seemed to follow suite. All-Ohio, SSU Invite, Aquanis I wasn't where I expected to be. This was going to be my year I thought.

"No more high school racing style, you will have a strong last 4k". I thought I was going to be the king of the course. I mean that's what got me through all those miles in the Dayton heat. Knowing I was coming into the season in the best aerobic shape out of anyone, yet I still can't cope with the stress when it matters. I thought I was doing everything right. When the team would go out after a meet or on weekends to drink, and live the typical college life, I would settle into the cabin and get ten hours of sleep. When I ate, I made sure I got enough fruits and vegetables. Stretched, ran my workouts smart, gave up any social life I could have. I mean what the fuck else do you have to do in order to be a successful collegiate athlete.

This frustrated me to no end, and kept me up at night. Knowing I was not only getting beat by a number of people on the team that I was easily beating last year, but my times in races and workouts were no where near 2010. I was pissed off, searching for answers in all the wrong places.

These past couple days or so I've really had time to reflect on my season, and after looking back on last year I've tried to pick out the positives so-far that I've got with me. One, last year at this time I could barley run two miles without tears in my eye. I had an inflamed sollesus bone (along shin) that would not seem to heal, legs were so burnt out from killing workouts with the big dogs, and an unfamiliar attitude about the right state of mind. Going into nationals last year I was scared and nervous. I was more fixated on enjoying the whole trip, and relying on the top guys to run the race for me I didn't realize what I'm here to do.

This year I've got many things going for me heading into Conference and Nationals. I've yet to really hit my stride in any race which means I've got a hell of a lot left in my tank that I plan to unleash when it counts. Second, not only am I not injured, my legs and body is at an all time calm and utter stand still ready to exert a tremendous amount of effort. Finally, After looking back on last years posts during this time, I've come to realize I'm missing the one ingredient I had. Confidence.

They say running is half mental, and its been a roller coaster ride for me this season. If I can just focus and set my mind on finishing out the season like I imagined when I was running waldruhe standard, or doing hill repeats up Linden hill. All of my life I've had a problem with staying consistent and this is the most important thing to me right now. My team has a good shot of bringing home a National Championship, and I'm willing to do anything and everything I can to help us succeed.

I'm fresh, Strong, Prepared, Experienced, and now I must find that racing edge.

Believe.

Don't Think Twice, It's Alright

It ain’t no use to sit and wonder why, babe
It don’t matter, anyhow
An’ it ain’t no use to sit and wonder why, babe
If you don’t know by now
When your rooster crows at the break of dawn
Look out your window and I’ll be gone
You’re the reason I’m trav’lin’ on
Don’t think twice, it’s all right

It ain’t no use in turnin’ on your light, babe
That light I never knowed
An’ it ain’t no use in turnin’ on your light, babe
I’m on the dark side of the road
Still I wish there was somethin’ you would do or say
To try and make me change my mind and stay
We never did too much talkin’ anyway
So don’t think twice, it’s all right

It ain’t no use in callin’ out my name, gal
Like you never did before
It ain’t no use in callin’ out my name, gal
I can’t hear you anymore
I’m a-thinkin’ and a-wond’rin’ all the way down the road
I once loved a woman, a child I’m told
I give her my heart but she wanted my soul
But don’t think twice, it’s all right

I’m walkin’ down that long, lonesome road, babe
Where I’m bound, I can’t tell
But goodbye’s too good a word, gal
So I’ll just say fare thee well
I ain’t sayin’ you treated me unkind
You could have done better but I don’t mind
You just kinda wasted my precious time
But don’t think twice, it’s all right