Sharing A Drink They Call Loneliness

I often think about how I've lost the opportunity to fall in love at a young age. Being single at 27, my world is filled with social media marriage proposal videos and baby announcements, yet here I am about to enter another year of failed relationships still living with my college roommate. I feel like everyday I am slowly inching my way to the dreaded 30 year mark alone, but free. Free to do what I want, how I want, when I want. That freedom to live your own life is something only a select few of us mid-twenty year old bachelors can appreciate. Yet I still feel a void in my life. A hole that no matter how many good times, fun trips, or days to myself I have, there is something missing.

In the movie, Into The Wild Christopher McCandles wrote, "Happiness is only real when shared", in his journal right before he laid down in that magical bus to die in the middle of the Alaskan wild. Perhaps after so many adventures and time spent alone, Christopher finally realized that you cannot simply get by in life without loving someone and sharing ones happiness together.

Part of me immediately spits back what I just said, with an aggressive "Fuck you, watch me do it" mentality, but part of me feels for Christopher and the hardship he endured alone in the wild. Another quote that is completely opposite from what McCandles says is from one of my favorite movies Fight Club, "We're a generation of men raised by women. I'm wondering if another women is really the answer we need". This takes on a whole different approach to the subject. Again, I have two views on this, but there is something inside of me that feeds into what is being said. Everything I need to accomplish what I want in this world is inside of me, and I dare a women to try and take that away.

After a certain age your chances of meeting "the one" will decrease dramatically. In High School and College it was easy meeting people. Students all have the same interest and agenda as you, and are usually looking to get swept of their feet, which unfortunately is never like what the movies make it out to be. The small amount of young professionals that make it out of college single are ultimately screwed. The working class will slowly get taken over by the fake un-meaningful existence that is a career - The other half will find happiness in binge watching Netflix with their newly adopted kitten in their parents spare bedroom or cool downtown loft apartment.

Your only hope in this world is thinking some of us slipped through the cracks and there is still a chance of true love. Sure, you have the single moms, divorced parents looking to try over, or the rare gem of the opposite sex that is in the exact seat you are in, but chances are you are in for a long lonely life. In the meantime, try to find inner happiness. A silver lining, that will promote good character, and meaningful moments in your life. Usually real relationships will happen out of no where. Who knows, one day you might just bump into Mrs. perfect reading a Barns And Noble top seller at Starbucks, or not.

The Continued Balance

(Start of the 2016 News & Sentinel Half Marathon)

One of my favorite quotes from one of my favorite cinemas,

"Sometimes you're flush and sometimes you're bust, and when you're up it's never as good as it seems, and when you're down, you never think you'll be up again, but life goes on".

This quote from the movie Blow is when George Yung's dad, Fred was explaining to George why money isn't real. It rings true to a lot of things that may be thrown your way in life. The hard part that I think Fred was trying to explain was that you have to learn to appreciate the balance of the ups and downs. To not get stuck at the far ends of each spectrum, but to understand a lot of the time life is hard. It is often that in our toughest moments in life, is when we force ourselves to adapt and grow.

I don't want to turn this post into another sob story about how I've once again trained hard, got hurt, then somehow overcame to continue to push towards fitness. Repeat the cycle and add some other life struggles, and you pretty much have my past 8 year life story. No, I want this to help people understand how you find positive outcomes out of every situation regardless of what you may see it as. Learn from it, use that knowledge, and move on because you'll never be truly satisfied when you're stuck in a shallow narrow minded view.

Extensor tendinitis turned from bad to worse to can't run on it. Masked by too many ibuprofen than i'd like to admit, eventually caused my achilles to become inflamed. Eventually getting diagnosed with bursitis. I ignored it as usual and attempting running here and there in hopes of holding onto fitness for the News and Sentinel Half Marathon last Saturday in Parkersburg, West Virginia. As you might have already figured out, the race didn't go well.

As I take this week to finally give my foot the rest it needs, I have time to reflect on the closing summer, figure out what went wrong, learn, adapt, and prepare to once again gear up for the upcoming fall training. I've often struggled to find the balance of the training that works best for me. This past buildup I was focused more on miles, then strength, and in previous base phases I tend to get into the weight room 5 times a week while holding a good bit of mileage. I'm still playing with the balance of the two, but one thing I know for sure is that i'm not able to recover and bounce back as quick as I use to in college. I need to focus on recover, and less on being stubborn. Training can be like balancing on a teeter-totter with a cactus at each side. Too much of one thing can result in becoming an unbalanced athlete often leading to injury. But like George Jung's father said, life goes on.

With the familiar smell of a fall breeze slowly making its way into the foothills of south east Ohio, I'm eager to get on some soft grass and run pain free again. I have one hundred and eight days until Club Nationals, and I don't plan to waste a single one of them.

- BJW

Why Do We Fall?

Why do we fall? So that we can learn to pick ourselves up.

This quote has always hit home for me, especially in these past couple weeks. I've been in the thick of my training, enjoying the process and trying not to let my beat-up body get the best of me. Every day has become a routine, and I'm learning to enjoy the healthy habits needed for success. In the meantime, I've found it enjoyable to break up the routine and try my hand in some summer road races with some former Shawnee State Bears.

WV 5K Championships

Freedom Fest 5K

The West Virginia 5K Championships on June 18th in Huntington, West Virginia (Results here), and this past Monday at the Freedom Fest 5K in Jackson, Ohio (Results here), have been both a learning experience, and a bit of a letdown for me. Leading into these races, I try to muster up any pop or freshness in my legs as I can, but they are always resistant and quick to remind me of how unfamiliar and unpleasant full-time training can do to your body. As you can see above, Eli Gerlach has shown me a familiar site at both races. Though it's fun competing, I find it more rewarding by putting "money in the bank" depositing miles after miles on your body in hopes of surpassing expected goals on that given day of withdraw.

The past eight weeks of training have been somewhat of a breeze so far, as I've just now been starting to get heavy in both volume and in workouts. My mileage has been slowly increasing (60, 59, 67, 70, 68, 75, 73), as I'm making sure to take things slowly and one step at a time. The plan is to continue increasing by 5 miles every two weeks, making the 100 mile benchmark by the first week of September, and holding that until Club Nationals December 10th. On top of more miles, my coach has begun incorporating an early week tempo/progression, as well as a later week fartlek/hill interval workout, and then topping it off with a up-tempo in the middle of my Sunday long run.

With the increase of volume, as well as continuing to get into the weight room twice a week for some strength and conditioning exercises, supplementary and core work, there is no doubt in my mind that I'm going to be in the best shape of my life this fall. But for now, I have to bit the bullet, enjoy the discomfort of a hard day's work, and not get caught up in meaningless summer road races.

In The Grind We Trust

As summer is quickly approaching, and the sweat stained miles are becoming an everyday occurrence, I thought now would be a good time to sit down and plan out my goals for the duration of 2016. Last month my roommate, Jeremy Anderson, and I sat down with Coach Tim Sykes at one of Athens local hot spots, Larry's Doghouse, to discuss our plans for the summer and fall. Coach Sykes helped us focus our ideas and energy into a detailed long-term developmental plan. Tim talked about how he likes to have his athletes make obtainable short term goals to help with long term success. Tim explained the breakdown of SMART (specific, measurable, obtainable, relevant, and time-bound) goals, and asked us get into the state of mind of an athlete in order to accomplish what we want.

The three things I wish to accomplish by August are one, to continue to slowly build up my volume while staying consistent with strength training, strides, and drills. As of this week, my mileage is at 70, and the plan is to add 5 miles every 2 weeks, until the first week of September. If I can stay patient enough and healthy, I will be at 100 miles per week the first week of September, and stay at 100 for 12 weeks leading into Florida. The second goal is putting more emphasize on recovery. Rope stretching and foam rolling have become my post-run routine, helping me stay flexible and hitting on range-of-motion. Breaking down scar-tissue and knots in my muscles by foam rolling is not fun task, but I know that it is essential to put as much time and energy into recovering from runs as I do on the run itself. Without proper recovery, there will be no gains and I will become flat and heavy.

The final goal I have for myself this summer, is focusing more on my diet. I have a unhealthy addiction to snacking at night, and eating my weight in candy (especially caramel creams). Nutrition goes hand-in-hand with recovery, and without eating right and hydrating, especially in the summer heat, I will most likely die a slow death on the roads. Pretty simple, more vegetables and smoothies, less sugar and shit.

The main goal for this fall will be the 2016 USATF Club Cross Country National Championships which are held in Tallahassee, Florida on December 10th. It will be the first time I will race a 10K on grass, with about 400 other runners of all ages and abilities. We are hoping to field a strong pack for Team Run Athens, and looking to do big things as a team. Individually, I hope to be in the best shape of my life, in contention to run mid 30's, and place in the top 50.

As for the 184 days until Club Nats, that will be spent building mileage and strength slowly but surely, while staying on-top of my goals and enjoying the task at hand. So, once again living by the clock has become the norm. I have yet to decide on my racing schedule leading up to December, but I will most likely run some summer road races, possibly a half-marathon in August, 2-3 Cross Country races this fall, and hopefully a fast time or two on the track if I can find a meet. For now, I'm enjoying the time spent training with my fellow Athens runners, and loving the grind.

- BJW

Thunderbunny 50K Race Report

Early this year my good friend and race director Michael Owen talked me into signing up for Athens, Ohio first ever 50K ultra race held at Strouds Run State Park, and named after one of his favorite the trails at Strouds, Thunderbunny Trail. I haven't had the best year of training so far in 2016. Dealing with two major injuries, as well as being sick a lot, left me with only a couple weeks to try and build some volume up in preparation for not only my longest run every, but longest race in my life.

One of my collegiate teammates Joe Stewart decided to jump on the oppertunity to race his first ultra as well and came to Athens for the weekend to experiance what it was like running 31 miles on trails. We both toed the line this past Saturday morning and were welcomed with low 50°and heavy rains. That didn't stop my eagerness to get out into the trails and see how I held up to the long foot race ahead. After the start I found myself in a pack of four runners, running in second place carefully watching my footing and convincing myself this was simply going to be a enjoyable easy experience. As we carefully avoided low limbs and turtles on the trail I found myself in a nice groove and easily clipping of low 8 minute miles on  the sloppy wet trails. I was not able to get anything from the first aid-station at mile 7.5, so was forced to hold off until around mile 13 where I quickly grabbed a couple gu's and a water bottle at the next station, and made sure not to loose contact from the leader, Nathan Yanko, even though he was only running the 25K race.

As Nathan and I left the aid-station only after about 20 seconds, David Riddle quickly surged to get back with us as we made our way through miles 13-15 together. David made a quick pass around us at mile 14.5 as I  was content of continue my enjoyable jog, Nathan went with him, as I thought those two were finishing up their  25K portion of their race. I lost sight of them as I continued on by myself after the split thinking I had a good size lead on second, and hoped this easy jogging feeling would stick around for a while. It wasn't until I headed down the hill around mile 19 that I saw David making his was up the hill looking strong. My ambition quickly diminished as I knew there would be no way I could run with him. Just around then I began hitting that foreseeable wall. I quickly crammed as much peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, peanut M&M's, licorice, and nuun water as I could at the aid-station. As I left and headed back out I knew I was in trouble. I had a 400ft. climb ahead, winning the race was out of my hands, and now I couldn't even run straight. I stopped for about two minutes at the bottom of the climb contemplating everything ahead. I knew it would be easy to walk away, jump in a car and get a ride to the finish, which I juggled around for a good bit, but I knew how upset I would be after. So I very slowly started walking to the top and tried shaking off this feeling of death. 

After about 4-5 minutes I started lightly jogging back onto the trail heading into Sells Park and pushed forward. Around mile 21 Joe Stewart and another runner had caught up to me. I told Joe what was going on and he was quick to hand me as many gu's as he could and told me to start taking them and push through it, which I did. I tried hanging onto them, but still was struggling to hold 9 minute pace. I wished them luck and and let them pass, as I was left to fight my own battle.

It took a while to snap out of it, but I slowly started to come out of the hump and actually had times where I felt really good and tried picking it up to catch up with Joe, but they were long gone. At the next aid-station around mile 25 I again ate as much as I could, and took a bit longer making sure that I was feeling up to par and able to finish the next 6 miles alright. I also had my ipod shuffle with me so listening to some music really helped get back into the groove of things. I made sure to keep on taking gu's and drinking as much as I could and tried enjoying the last section of trail heading back into Strouds before making my way to the finish. The last mile was on the road and my stride felt great! My legs still having a good pop to them and a sense of great accomplishment came over me as I crossed the line in 4 hours, 23 minutes and 9 seconds.

This race was a very humbling experience, as I now have a great appreciation for people who are able to run such long distances and push past the point of complete depletion. I'm happy with the outcome, even though I really wanted the win, I learned a lot and I am eager to get back on the trails again soon to test my limits. 

- BJW

Seasons Beautiful Moments

Summer

You are in the middle of the woods, surrounded by tall pines, you look up into the sun, and notice the bright yellow beams  shining through the tall green limbs, and at once you are at peace and totally free. Happiness slides right under you and you cant help but appreciate everything in life. Summer warmth strikes down by 8 am, as you continue your way down the single-track pine needle trail. You take a deep breath of the forest air, and instantly feel at one with the trees, animals and dirt.

Spring

You awake by the drops of heavy rain hitting your window to remind you of the morning miles on schedule for today. The weather is calling for mid 60 degrees and a slight drizzle. You grab your freshly broken-in trainers and slowly lace them to your feet ensuring total comfort. You take of down the gravel road and are drenched within minutes, but as you float on finding your rhythm of the day, you slowly realize that there is nothing you would rather be doing at that moment. You clip of mile after mile with a welcomed soul and a new reality of the world ahead of you.

Fall

Mud coated leaves surround the bleak green grass, as you continue compulsively lacing up your Nike spikes in preparation for the battle ahead. It's cross country season, with a cloudy sky and a chilly breeze in the air, the smell of decomposing rich autumn soil is sparking up old memories. You take three or four strides on the well manicured golf course, and appreciate the comfort of the soft inch long wet grass. The gun goes off and everything changes.

Winter

Early winter mornings awoken by the suns reflection of the fresh powdery snow that blanketed the cabins landscape last night. You prepare for the cold harshness by layering up, as the kettle on the stove lets you know it is hot and ready for the mornings brew. You throw some beans into the grinder and instantly get hit by the rich smell of the dark-roast oily beans. Five minutes go by, and the french press is ready to deliver the harsh deep welcoming note that you both need and wanted. You take your first sip, with caution and an open mind, and get taken away by the possibilities of the day.

- BJW

Original Content

All of my life, I've been trying to fight the fight of staying original. True to my roots, and what I believe. It has been one of the hardest things I've ever done. Everyday you're tempted by society's tricks and gimmicks to make you buy a certain type of clothes, listen to specific artist, or buy this car or that house. Media and money run this world, and it is nearly impossible to avoid he bull shit and have you own real thoughts.

I have tried to live by the quote, "You were brown an original, don't die a copy", and there is nothing more beautiful and attractive than being committed to this and being real. The one thing that has helped me stay in touch with my beliefs is of course running As in every blog I write, I thank running as if it were my God. My bible, Once a Runner, touches upon a lot of things that are important to me. Being able to find meaning and beauty of a run, and how anything can be brought back to the simplicity of a choice. One quote in particular stands out to me, "My only real secret was, commitment to the task. A promise so simple, but so impossibly hard to honor. How they could be expected to understand that?..." I feel like sometimes its my job, my duty, to show people the beauty of a run, and how being committed to a task can be the best thing in your life.

The spring time itch has taken over again, and the hunger for long miles, trail runs and the discomfort of lactate threshold induced miles has risen. I am in no where close to where I want to be fitness wise, but I'm really enjoying the process, or as Quenton says, "the task". As of now, it looks like I will be ready to roll again in late May early June. I had to forgo my indoor/outdoor season due to a knee injury in late January, but it gave me enough time to enjoy the woods and welcome in the warm spring weather, and now my legs are hungry for what lies ahead.

These past four weeks I have been slowly building up my mileage while participating in a study done by a graduate student at Ohio University. He is comparing the benefits of running vs. EliptiGO training. After two VO2 Max tests and a couple 5K time trails, I am now free to train the way I want to, and I have set forth a hearty summer race schedule.

I will end with yet another quote that I find enjoyable to ponder upon.

"Isn't it true that you start your life a sweet child, believing in everything under your father's roof? Then comes the day of the Laodiceans, when you know you are wretched and miserable and poor and blind and naked, and with the visage of a gruesome, grieving ghost you go shuddering through nightmare life".
- Jack Kerouac

Go and be real.
- BJW