Sharing A Drink They Call Loneliness

I often think about how I've lost the opportunity to fall in love at a young age. Being single at 27, my world is filled with social media marriage proposal videos and baby announcements, yet here I am about to enter another year of failed relationships still living with my college roommate. I feel like everyday I am slowly inching my way to the dreaded 30 year mark alone, but free. Free to do what I want, how I want, when I want. That freedom to live your own life is something only a select few of us mid-twenty year old bachelors can appreciate. Yet I still feel a void in my life. A hole that no matter how many good times, fun trips, or days to myself I have, there is something missing.

In the movie, Into The Wild Christopher McCandles wrote, "Happiness is only real when shared", in his journal right before he laid down in that magical bus to die in the middle of the Alaskan wild. Perhaps after so many adventures and time spent alone, Christopher finally realized that you cannot simply get by in life without loving someone and sharing ones happiness together.

Part of me immediately spits back what I just said, with an aggressive "Fuck you, watch me do it" mentality, but part of me feels for Christopher and the hardship he endured alone in the wild. Another quote that is completely opposite from what McCandles says is from one of my favorite movies Fight Club, "We're a generation of men raised by women. I'm wondering if another women is really the answer we need". This takes on a whole different approach to the subject. Again, I have two views on this, but there is something inside of me that feeds into what is being said. Everything I need to accomplish what I want in this world is inside of me, and I dare a women to try and take that away.

After a certain age your chances of meeting "the one" will decrease dramatically. In High School and College it was easy meeting people. Students all have the same interest and agenda as you, and are usually looking to get swept of their feet, which unfortunately is never like what the movies make it out to be. The small amount of young professionals that make it out of college single are ultimately screwed. The working class will slowly get taken over by the fake un-meaningful existence that is a career - The other half will find happiness in binge watching Netflix with their newly adopted kitten in their parents spare bedroom or cool downtown loft apartment.

Your only hope in this world is thinking some of us slipped through the cracks and there is still a chance of true love. Sure, you have the single moms, divorced parents looking to try over, or the rare gem of the opposite sex that is in the exact seat you are in, but chances are you are in for a long lonely life. In the meantime, try to find inner happiness. A silver lining, that will promote good character, and meaningful moments in your life. Usually real relationships will happen out of no where. Who knows, one day you might just bump into Mrs. perfect reading a Barns And Noble top seller at Starbucks, or not.

The Continued Balance

(Start of the 2016 News & Sentinel Half Marathon)

One of my favorite quotes from one of my favorite cinemas,

"Sometimes you're flush and sometimes you're bust, and when you're up it's never as good as it seems, and when you're down, you never think you'll be up again, but life goes on".

This quote from the movie Blow is when George Yung's dad, Fred was explaining to George why money isn't real. It rings true to a lot of things that may be thrown your way in life. The hard part that I think Fred was trying to explain was that you have to learn to appreciate the balance of the ups and downs. To not get stuck at the far ends of each spectrum, but to understand a lot of the time life is hard. It is often that in our toughest moments in life, is when we force ourselves to adapt and grow.

I don't want to turn this post into another sob story about how I've once again trained hard, got hurt, then somehow overcame to continue to push towards fitness. Repeat the cycle and add some other life struggles, and you pretty much have my past 8 year life story. No, I want this to help people understand how you find positive outcomes out of every situation regardless of what you may see it as. Learn from it, use that knowledge, and move on because you'll never be truly satisfied when you're stuck in a shallow narrow minded view.

Extensor tendinitis turned from bad to worse to can't run on it. Masked by too many ibuprofen than i'd like to admit, eventually caused my achilles to become inflamed. Eventually getting diagnosed with bursitis. I ignored it as usual and attempting running here and there in hopes of holding onto fitness for the News and Sentinel Half Marathon last Saturday in Parkersburg, West Virginia. As you might have already figured out, the race didn't go well.

As I take this week to finally give my foot the rest it needs, I have time to reflect on the closing summer, figure out what went wrong, learn, adapt, and prepare to once again gear up for the upcoming fall training. I've often struggled to find the balance of the training that works best for me. This past buildup I was focused more on miles, then strength, and in previous base phases I tend to get into the weight room 5 times a week while holding a good bit of mileage. I'm still playing with the balance of the two, but one thing I know for sure is that i'm not able to recover and bounce back as quick as I use to in college. I need to focus on recover, and less on being stubborn. Training can be like balancing on a teeter-totter with a cactus at each side. Too much of one thing can result in becoming an unbalanced athlete often leading to injury. But like George Jung's father said, life goes on.

With the familiar smell of a fall breeze slowly making its way into the foothills of south east Ohio, I'm eager to get on some soft grass and run pain free again. I have one hundred and eight days until Club Nationals, and I don't plan to waste a single one of them.

- BJW